Bohemian Parody

Ladies, Gentlemen, A-sexuals, Bisexuals, Homosexuals, pre-op transsexuals, Company managers.
May I present... Bohemian Parody. (By Mazz Murray)

Is this the real song? Is this for charity?
Written for laughs and escaping all clarity.
Open your hearts,
We'll show these old farts, just see!
I'm just a poor turn; I need your sympathy!
Because we're: easy hired, easy fired,
Always ill, and very tired.
Anyway we opened, press all took their seats,
Coz they're free (they're free)
Mama, just read the critics,
They said we were the pits,
Tried to put us in the sh!ts.
Mama, we had just begun,
And now they've gone and thrown it all away.
Mama, oooooh.
Did they mean to make us cry?
If we don't do another show tomorrow.
Carry on, carry on, cos critics never matter.
Nigel Planer!
Nigel Planer!
Too late our time has come.
We can fill that barn.
So much more than Notre dame.
Goodbye every body.
We've got to go.
Got a global dream,
We thought we did it all
Mama, ooh (any way the palms flow)
We don't want to close.
We'd rather that, than never been hired at all.
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! etc...
I see a little silhouette of the press.
Scare em off! Scare em off!
Kick em in the fandangos!
Thunderbolts and lightening,
Very Sarah Brightman.
Daily Mail (Daily Mail)
Daily mail (Daily Mail)
Daily Mail could you go?
Magnifico-o-o
I'm just a poor turn in a rich company.
He's just a poor turn in a rich company.
Spare us our jobs, give us longevity.
Easy hired, easy fired, we are very tired.
Ben Elton, no! We will not let him go, let him go,
Ben Elton, we will not let him go, let him go,
Ben Elton, we will not let him go, let him go,
Will not let him go, let him go,
Will not let him go. Let him go-o-o-o,
No no no no no no no.
Oh mamma mia mamma mia (mamma mia it's a show)
Our lives were changed,
When we did the Jubilee,
With royalty on BBC TV.
So you think you can stab us and spit in our eyes?
Now I suppose you won't love us and wish you could die
Oh Brian
We will run for you Brian
Get those critics out,
Just get those critics right out of here
Oooooh Oooooh Oooooh
Roger! Roger!
Critics never matter, only when their bad
Critics never matter.
Critics never matter, they're sad.
Anyway we're sold out