You're a 90's kid if...

You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"

You can sing the rap to "The Fresh Prince Of Bel Air"

You remember when Kurt Cobain, Tu Pac, River Phoenix, and Selena died.

You know that "WOAH" comes from Joey from "Blossom" and that "How Rude!" comes from Stephanie from "Full House"

You remember when it was actually worth getting up early
on a Saturday to watch cartoons.

You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.

You remember reading "Goosebumps"

You know the profound meaning of "Wax on, wax off"

You have pondered why Smurfette was the only female smurf.

You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.

You danced to "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls, Females: had a new motto, Males: got a whole lot gay-er. (so tell me what you want, what you really really want.)

You remember the craze, then the banning of slap bracelets and slam books.

You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence...Not...

Where in the world is Carmen San Diego? was both a game and a TV game show.

Captain Planet.

You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green Ranger were meant to be together.

When playing power rangers with friends you fought over who got to be who............and still all ended up being Tommy.

You remember when super nintendo's became popular.

You remember watching home alone 1, 2 , and 3........and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"

"I've fallen and I can't get up"

You remember going to the skating rink before there were inline skates

Two words... Trapper Keeper.

You never got injured on a Slip 'n' Slide

You wore socks over leggings scrunched down

You remember boom boxes vs. cd players

You remember New Kids on The Block when they were cool

You knew all the characters names and their life stories on "Saved By The Bell"

You played and/or collected "Pogs"

You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet or Nano and brought it everywhere

You watched the original Care Bears, My Little Pony, and Ninja Turtles

Yikes pencils and erasers were the stuff!

All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.(pencils.notebooks.binders.etc.)

You remember when the new Beanie Babies were always sold out.

You used to wear those stick on earings, not only on your ears, but at the corners of your eyes.

You remember a time before the WB.

Before the MySpace frenzy...

Before the Internet & text messaging...

Before Sidekicks & iPods...

Before MIKE JONES...

Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX...

...Back when you put off the 5 hours of homework you had every night.

When light up sneakers were cool.

When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.

When gas was $0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was a new thing.

When we recorded stuff on VCRs & paid $3.50 for a movie.

When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off our walkmans.

When 2Pac and Biggie where alive.

When the Chicago Bulls were the best team ever.

Way back.

Tag.

Get Over Here!!!! means something to you.

Hide-n-Go Seek at dusk.

Red Light, Green Light.

Heads Up 7 Up.

Playing Kickball & Dodgeball until your porch light came on.

Hopskotch.

Slip-n-Slides.

Tree Houses.

Hula Hoops.

HELLO....HOT WHEELS!!!!!

"POWER OF LOVE" BY CELINE DION..ONLY COUPLES COULD SKATE TO THIS.

The annoying Giga Pets & Furbies.

Running through the sprinklers.

That "Little Mermaid"

Crying when Mufasa died in the Lion King.

Happy Meals where you chose a Barbie or a Hot Wheels car.

Getting the privelage to sit in the front seat of the car.

Drinking Sqeeze It "Squeeze The Fun Out Of It"

CAPRI SUN

Watching Saturday Morning Cartoons in your PJ's still wrapped up in your TMNT, Power Rangers, Barbie, Fairy Princess comforter.

The original Power Rangers

Or what about:

Hey Arnold.

Rugrats.

The Secret World of Alex Mac.

Ren & Stimpy.

Double Dare.

Rocco's Modern Life.

AAAHH!! REAL MONSTERS.

Wild & Crazy Kids.

Clarissa Explains it All.

CAMP NOWHERE

Salute Your Shorts(CAMP ANAWANA)

Are You Afraid of the Dark?

The original cast members of All That.

Kenan & Kel.

"CITY GUYS"...ROLLW/ THE CITY GUYS

Doug.

Magic School Bus.

Nick Arcade.

Flash Forward.

The Adventures of Pete and Pete.

Legends of the Hidden Temple

Hey Dude.

Dinosaurs.

Alladin.

Mummies Alive

Pinky and the Brain

Sailor Moon.

Blossom.

Hangin with Mr. Cooper.

Martin

Beavis & Butt-Head

Wishbone.

Bill Nye the Science Guy

MR RODGERS!!!!

Who could forget Snick? & Nick @ Nite with Bewitched, I Dream of Jenie, The Facts of Life, I Love Lucy and TGIF.

Where everyone wanted to be in love after watching The Wonder Years.

or Nick Jr. with Face

Gulah Gulah Island

Little Bear

Busy Town

Under the Umbrella Tree

PEE-WEE!!!

The Big Comfy Couch

Kool-Aid was the drink of choice.

Wearing your new shoes on the first day of school.

Class field trips.

When Christmas was the most exciting time of year.

When $5 seemed like a million, & another dollar a miracle.

When you begged to go to McDonalds for dinner everyday.

When Toys R Us overuled the mall.

Go back to the time when:

Decisions were made by going 'eeny-meeny-miney-moe'.

Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming 'do over!'

'Race issue' ment arguing about who ran the fastest.

Money issues were handled by whoever was banker in 'Monopoly.'

It wasn't odd to have two or three 'best' friends.

Being old referred to anyone over 20.

A chance to skate as a couple at the local roller rink was like winning the lottery.

Scrapes & bruises were kissed & made better.

It was a big deal to finally be tall enought to ride the 'big people' rides at the fair.

When playing Nintendo was the hardest thing ever.

When Ninja Turtles ruled the world.

Another Baby Sitter Club and Little Sister (Karen) book came out and you put your name on hold for it at the library.

When Aladdin was new, before the trilogy was complete.

Sockem Boppers

Before we realized all this would eventually disappear

You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"

You know the Macarena by heart.

"Talk to the hand" ... enough said

You thought Brain woud finally take over the world

You always said, "Then why don't you marry it!"

You remember when everyone went slinky crazy.

You remember when razor scooters were cool.

Linux == Pedos

REUTERS - A team of scientists at MIT have discovered a link between desktop operating system choice and several serious social and mental disorders. The team did a wide-ranging survey across three states of 20,000 males and 10,000 female users ages 18 to 25, drawn from users of three popular desktop operating systems; Microsoft Windows, Apple OS X and Linux. The volunteers were divided into groups according to their operating system and subjected to a series of tests meant to determine their individual IQs as well as cognitive, social and behavioral abnormalities.

The results of the testing showed that the group with the highest mean IQ by some margin was the Linux test group, averaging at 117, levels expected of good undergraduate students.The Windows and Apple groups averaged at 103 and 101 respectively, well within expected ranges. The Linux group showed highly elevated levels of several socio-cognitive disorders including several linked to pedophilia and violent outbursts, while the Apple group seemed to be the most socially adjusted. The Apple group were also determined to be more likely to be musicians or consider themselves artists and had a higher proportion of homosexuals, at 43%, than either the Windows or Linux groups, who were both closer to the expected average of 9%.

España es un bar

¿Alguna vez se han planteado cómo nace un pueblo?. Pues muy fácil.

Llega un tío a un desierto, pone un bar, y alrededor empiezan a

construir casas. ¡Por lo menos en España!.

La prueba es que en España hay pueblos sin escuela, sin ayuntamiento,

sin farmacia, sin cuartelillo...., pero sin bar...¡Ni de coña!. Claro

que, por lo menos, allí es donde te dan más cuartelillo.... ¿Y saben cuál

es el motivo?. Que en los bares podemos hacer muchísimas cosas no

podemos hacer en casa..

En un bar puedes tirar al suelo las cabezas de las gambas...

Tíralas en casa y verás la que se lía... en el bar tiras las cabezas de

las gambas y las tapan con serrín. ¿Qué se cae una cerveza?. ¡La tapan

con serrín! ¿Qué se cae un borracho?.¡Lo tapan con serrín!. ¡Será por

serrín!. Otra cosa no, pero en un bar hay más serrín que en la tumba de Pinocho.

Sin embargo, hay otras cosas que haces mejor en casa que en el bar: ¡mear!.

Para entrar en el baño del bar tienes que hacerlo con katiuskas.

Claro que, de vez en cuando, se pasa el dueño y echa en el suelo un

poquito de serrín.

Pero es que la taza también está guarra, porque nadie tira de la

cadena... Y estoy seguro de que si en un bar tiras de la cadena cae serrín.

El bar también sirve para quedar con los colegas. Porque mi casa

es tan pequeña que sólo cabemos tres (y sin el móvil), Y, claro ¿dónde vas

a quedar si no? ¿En una ferretería?. ¿En la farmacia? ¿Y que vas a pedir,

tres chupitos de Bisolvon y dos lexatines?. ¿O en la Iglesia?..Y eso..

que... pensándolo bien...una iglesia es lo más parecido a un bar...

Hay un señor detrás de una barra, vino, música, gente... y a veces hay

hostias...

Y los domingos, a la hora del aperitivo, los dos sitios se ponen hasta el culo.

Eso sí, en los bares hay más buen rollito que en la Iglesia...

Porque mientras que en la Iglesia pasa un tío con una panera para que

sueltes algo, en el bar discutes por pagar. ¿Dónde más pasa eso?. ¿En la

Comunidad de vecinos?. ¿Se imaginan que discutiéramos por invitar en la

Comunidad de Vecinos, por ejemplo?:

- ¡Chssst!. La parabólica la pago yo.

- Pero si tú ya pagaste la caldera...

- ¡Qué más da!... ¡Si no vamos a salir de pobres!.

Y otra cosa: tu casa ¿cómo se llama?. Pues "tu casa" o como mucho "4º-C".

¡Y anda que no hay "cuartos ces"!. En cambio, los bares tienen

nombres fascinantes_ El Barbi-túrico, el Bár-bara-Rey, la Tasca-breao.

Yo debo PELAS en todos, pero en donde más debo en el Bar-Clays Bank.

Eso sí, en un bar, lo más importante es el camarero. Los camareros

se pueden dividir básicamente en dos tipos: el camarero ÁGIL... y el

AGIL-apollado. El AGIL, según entras por la puerta, te limpia la mesa,te

acerca el servilletero, te pone una caña y te dice:

- Van dos cero, gana el Madrid, ha bajado el índice Dow Jones y el

político menos valorado es Mayor Oreja... ¿te pongo una de oreja?.

El AGIL-apollado se reconoce porque parece que esté saliendo de la anestesia: ni te oye, ni te ve. Tú le estás haciendo señas, como si

estuvieras aparcando un avión, pero el tío pasa por tu lado sin

mirarte, como un médico de la Seguridad Social. Que entras por la mañana,

y cuando por fin te hace caso...

- A ver. ¿qué va a ser?.

- ¿Que qué va a ser...? ¡Dentro de nada de noche, huevazos!.

Pero donde el bar alcanza la gloria es cuando hay partido. El bar

es el TEMPLO DEL FUTBOL. Antes había unos carteles en los que se leía:

"Estupendos berberechos", "Tenemos nécoras deliciosas". Ahora

no, ahora ponen: "HOY: DEPOR-REAL MADRID..." Y en todo el día no se habla

de otra cosa... Nada más entrar pides una caña y el camarero te dice:

"Morientes tiene osteopatía de pubis". Y ésa es la gran diferencia

entre el bar y tu casa: nunca se discute por el mando. En el bar no hay

zapping: Si hay partido, se ve el partido; si hay patinaje artístico, se

ve el partido; si hay "Informe Semanal", se ve el partido; y si hay peli

porno en el Plus... ¡Se graba el partido!.

Frosted Brains

A blonde called her boyfriend and said, "Please come over here and
help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure it out or how to
get it started." Her boyfriend asked, "What is it supposed to be when
it's finished?" The blonde said, "According to the picture on the box,
it's a tiger." Her boyfriend decided to go over and help with the puzzle.
She let him in and showed him where she had the puzzle spread all over
the table. He studied the pieces for a moment, then looked at the box,
then turned to her and said, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're
not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling
a tiger.
He took her hand and said, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice
cup of hot chocolate and then...", He sighed, ...
"Let's put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box."

Santa Banned

Wed Nov 14, 11:04 PM ET

SYDNEY (AFP) - Santas in Australia's largest city have been told not to use Father Christmas's traditional "ho ho ho" greeting because it may be offensive to women, it was reported Thursday.

Sydney's Santa Clauses have instead been instructed to say "ha ha ha" instead, the Daily Telegraph reported.

One disgruntled Santa told the newspaper a recruitment firm warned him not to use "ho ho ho" because it could frighten children and was too close to "ho", a US slang term for prostitute.

"Gimme a break," said Julie Gale, who runs the campaign against sexualising children called Kids Free 2B Kids.

"We are talking about little kids who do not understand that "ho, ho, ho" has any other connotation and nor should they," she told the Telegraph.

"Leave Santa alone."

A local spokesman for the US-based Westaff recruitment firm said it was "misleading" to say the company had banned Santa's traditional greeting and it was being left up to the discretion of the individual Santa himself.

Diplomacy